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Wednesday, December 24, 2003
What do YOU think?? Tuesday, December 23, 2003
wow. I'm fat. Maybe I can cook better with the fat. You don't ever see any skinny chef's on TV with their on shows, do you?? Now that I'm home, I have so much free time. All I do now is play computer, cook, play piano, and most of all, I end up thinking. And we all know what happens when I think too much. I end up with crazy ideas. For example, the idea of my switching of majors from electrical engineering to jazz performance on the violin is beginning to tickle my imagination more and more. Everyone says my brain pattern is different than everyone else in terms of music...but is it sooo different that I have a legitimate chance to be a pioneer in jazz music??? Ice skating on Friday was fun. Sunday was fun as well. This Saturday better be fun. sleepy tired. What do YOU think?? Tuesday, December 09, 2003
Haha. Funny. During thanksgiving break I gave Kat a call and left a message. Bugerking3: so when is your last final? weirdwoodchuck: scheduled: friday weirdwoodchuck: i have a take home that's due wednesday weirdwoodchuck: along with a project weirdwoodchuck: i hope to have them done by the end of that weekend weirdwoodchuck: but that might be pushing it Bugerking3: I think i'll be back in town by monday evening weirdwoodchuck: awesome weirdwoodchuck: i checked my messages for the first time since thanksgiving weirdwoodchuck: i was confused weirdwoodchuck: and thought you were in town again Bugerking3: ?? Bugerking3: haha Bugerking3: ohyeah weirdwoodchuck: i think i scared sam Bugerking3: how so?? Bugerking3: you wandered into his room? Bugerking3: yelling my name?? weirdwoodchuck: no weirdwoodchuck: it wasn't that bad Bugerking3: darn Bugerking3: no fun in that weirdwoodchuck: haha weirdwoodchuck: me wandering up and down the third floor hall (people there already think i'm nuts) screaming the name of someone that's a hundred miles away Bugerking3: hahaa Bugerking3: you're a dork Bugerking3: so when did this lovely incident occur? weirdwoodchuck: last night Bugerking3: you thought i was in town last night?? Bugerking3: a fine, fine Rice graduate you will be some day weirdwoodchuck: someday weirdwoodchuck: i though it was somewhat weird Bugerking3: yes...that should have occurred to you the minute you checked your phone weirdwoodchuck: i really should start deleting my messages weirdwoodchuck: i think that would solve the problem Bugerking3: yes, that would definitely reduce the level of your dork-meter weirdwoodchuck: yay!! What do YOU think?? Monday, December 08, 2003
This is the most beautiful paragraph I have ever read in the past semester. Sure beats voltages, current, partial derivatives, 001011110110111, and even text about jazz music. Some Final Thoughts: Be as brave as Achilles, as loyal as Hector, and as dedicated as Aeneas. Walk conscientiously the stright road of life so you never awake to find yourself in a dark wood of confusion and regret, heading for the Inferno. But if you do, remember there's a way out - it depends on you. Remember what Creon and Antigone learned: fate does not rule your destiny; you make your own choices, and in the end you must take responsibility for them. Remember what Lear learned: love is not measured by words or money, and Daisy Miller: appearances do count. Discover the dark places of your own heart so you can triumph over them. Don't, like Sethe, dwell on what is past and can't be changed. Exorcise your ghosts and get on with it. Value hard work and tradition as Okonkwo did, but remember what Achebe taught us: compromise and tolerance are important to man and to society. And finally, don't, like Ivan Ilyich, waste your life in striving only for that which is pleasant and proper. Be instead, like Robert Frost, a swinger of birches. Climb the black branches up a snow white trunk toward heaven, but remember that "earth's the right place for love." Franceane Bunner even though I know only half of those characters (knowing only half-well), Ms. Bunner must have been the best English teacher to compose with such eloquence a beautiful quote. What do YOU think?? Saturday, December 06, 2003
What do YOU think?? Tuesday, December 02, 2003
Holy moly sweetly merciful, this is the coolest thing I've read. This entry will be a bit different from the previous ones. This one is based off of my observations of the things around me, and how I can hopefully apply that into my life. So many of you, or some of you, may know that I like to feed the squirrels. I actually do this quite often, usually after class, and heading back to the dorm. Now there is actually much to be learned from feeding the squirrels, I have come to find out. My first observation is that they are all different. and react differently to my offering them sunflower seeds. Some are very aggressive, and will come right up to me, and in one instance, even crawled up my leg (I was wearing jeans) and ate out of my hand. Others are extremely timid, and I end up chasing them around trying to feed them. My comparison may sound extremely conceited, but please bare with me. The way I relate this to my life, is I consider the squirrels to be like humans in this scenario, and myself, the feeder, to be God. As much as I like to compare myself with God, the primary focus of this entry will be on the response of the squirrels (us) to the feeder (God). Just to establish the function of the feeder in the analogy, is merely to feed, and has an abundance of seeds (a 1 lb bag in my case). And again, the focus of this entry will be on the response of the squirrels. To accompany the first observation, I relate it to how we initially respond to God. There are some of us that are very gung-ho about it, and immediately trust and give all that they are. But then, I think the majority of us are much more cautious. We like to test the waters, be like Nemo’s dad from “Finding Nemo” going out of their home to go out then back in, then back out, back in, etc. Many of us are cautious, and for what seems to be good reason, safety, comfort, knowledge. We feel we know our surroundings, and don’t want to change the fact that there may be something out there that we don’t know, that is beyond our power or our comprehension. Many of us also act like the squirrels, busying themselves with finding food, playing around, finding other squirrels, etc. When all the time there is a person there more than willing to feed you more than you can ever imagine. I mean, to have a one-pound bag of sunflower seeds for an animal that probably doesn’t even weigh a pound, that is a lot of food. This brings me to my next observation. Two squirrels find it extremely difficult, if not impossible to feed out of the same hand of food. If there are even two squirrels that are willing to accept the food from the feeder, the two squirrels bicker and fight. Eventually one usually wins over and takes all the food. Now when this happens, I still give the food to the triumphant squirrel, but I also put seed in my other hand and try to give it to the other squirrel on the other side of my body so that they hopefully won’t fight. The way I relate this spiritually, is that even when we are beat down by other Christians who try to hoard God’s blessings towards us, that God will not say ‘oh, that’s it, that’s all I have’, but He will graciously extend and grant more and more blessings towards us if we are willing to push beyond the pressure of others around us, and still come to Him humble, and merely in need of His presence and love towards us. God’s love is not conditional (even though my love towards squirrels may be…) and He will never fail to take us back and extend grace towards us. Sometimes I go even when it is cold and raining and wait for the squirrels to find me. I don’t do this often, only when I have the free time, but I think this can also be related spiritually. God will pursue us no matter the circumstances and will try to find us, but it will be up to us to go to Him, and accept. Unlike my only going out when convenient for me, God goes out all the time, constantly looking for people to respond to His offer. His offer is unconditional, and always available if we look hard enough. We may feel like we are in the coldest of moments, in the hardest of trials, or in the deepest of sins, but God is right there along with us, pursuing us, and giving us hope of something grand. My last observation: the squirrels have to recognize the feeder. The squirrels can’t just go up to random people and expect to get food. But don’t we do this all the time? Looking for comfort in others, boyfriends, girlfriends, just friends, or family? We look towards money and prosperity to make us think we are satisfied. We look towards achievements and accolades to keep us going. We find anything we can sometimes to keep us from acknowledging that we need the true feeder, that we need God. But only when we come to a fuller knowledge of God do we begin to trust in Him, and begin to respond properly to Him. Only after we know who the feeder is, are we able to discern Him from the other people and distractions out there for us, and are able to feed from His hand. Many of us stop there though, but as a true response to the feeder, we need to tell others about Him. When we see our brothers and sisters longing to fill their lives with the distractions, and constantly upset by the lack of fulfillment, do we just stand and laugh, hoping they will not find the true feeder so that we can eat more? NO. We need to learn to comfort others and guide them towards that which gives us strength. Not that we did it by ourselves, but that we are enabled by the one giving us food and strength. We cannot allow our brothers and sisters to go hungry looking for food their own way in ignorance. But on the flip side, we can’t push and ‘bite’ them to where they have no choice but to come to the feeder. Instead we need to encourage, and show them the way, show them something they long for and need, and direct them towards the feeder, be transparent and allow God to use us and point others towards Him. I know that my analogy is flawed in many respects, but please understand that this was from squirrels, and it is a bit difficult, albeit fun. May we learn to know the feeder, to trust in Him, to respond to him, and to bring others to know Him. Written by a guy named melvin fong. What do YOU think?? Saturday, November 29, 2003
I swear, everytime I see text written by stephanie I keep imagining a volcano of ebonics just waiting to erupt. Everything flows so well. And it rhymes too. Dat girl tryin to bust out wit da ghetto off da hook. What do YOU think?? Tuesday, November 18, 2003
befoore i forget the link http://demand1.stream.aol.com/ramgen/aol/us/aolmusic/artists/wmg/joshgroban/joshgroban_closer_lp.rm What do YOU think?? Saturday, November 15, 2003
Something random but not so random, tape on bottom of shoes = win!!! And only ONE of you would understand why. yep. Tape on shoes... What do YOU think?? What do YOU think?? Tuesday, November 04, 2003
What do YOU think?? Monday, November 03, 2003
blue text means I like it. it is significant to me. The subject of "Friends" has been in my mind for quite some time, along with the subject of relationships. Some good things to read and dwell on are: THE TRUTH ABOUT TRUE FRIENDS "You may be surprised to know, as I was, that the words friends, friendly, and friendship appear over a hundred times in the Scriptures. God says a lot about friends. As I read all the verses and think about true friendship, I believe it all boils down to four things. First, friends are not optional; they're essential. There is no substitute for a friend--someone to care, to listen, to comfort, and, yes, occasionally, to reprove. True friends do that best. Second, friends are not automatic; they must be cultivated. The Bible says, "A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly" (Prov. 18:24, KJV). Samuel Johnson wrote: "One should keep his friendship in a constant repair." As with trees, friendship needs cultivation. Third, friends are not neutral; they impact our lives. If your friends lead good lives, they encourage you to become a better person. If your friends lead disreputable lives, they lead you down the same path--or worse. Scripture says, "Be not deceived: Bad company corrupts good morals" (I Cor.15:33). So choose your friends carefully and wisely. Gossips usually gravitate to gossips. Rebels run with rebels. You want to be wise? Choose wise friends. Fourth, friendships come in varying degrees, some of whom play more significant roles in our life than others. We have many acquaintances, some casual friends, several close friends, and a few intimate friends. Acquaintances are people with whom we have spasmodic contact and superficial interaction. We just skate over the surface with acquaintances. 'How are ya?' 'Fine, fine! Great!' (I'm really not fine, but I can't tell you that because you're only an acquaintance.) Casual friends are people with whom we have more contact, with whom we have common interests, and with whom we may have more specific conversations. Every once in a while we will even seek the opinion of a person who is a casual friend, although there is still a safe distance between us. Close friends are those people with whom we share similar life goals and with whom we discuss the hard questions. We do projects together, exercise together, socialize together, and sometimes even vacation together. Intimate friends are those few people with whom we have regular contact and a deep commitment. We are not only open and vulnerable with these people, we anxiously await their counsel. Intimate friends are just as free to criticize and to correct as they are to embrace and encourage, because trust and mutual understanding has been established between them. All of these levels of friendship are important, but the most important, of course, is the last. Those who have no intimate friends have to be the loneliest people in the world. All of us need at least one person with whom we can be open and honest; all of us need at least one person who offers us the shelter of support and encouragement and yes, even hard truths and confrontation. Sheltering trees, all!" From "David" by Chuck Swindoll What do YOU think?? by the way, 3 weeks ago was Prom #2, aka the UT Masquerade Ball. AnD here, we have hotness perfectly captured in one picture. 
As well as here:  What do YOU think?? Monday, October 27, 2003
haha, thanks stephanie for signing. Lets do lunch. Hrm....If I skip my morning class at 9, drive 3 hours to houston, catch stephanie at Sammy's at 12, eat until....3?? :) Eat for three hours. Measure the inches my waist is slowly gaining. Wow...I just had a 3 minute IM conversation. It's probably the most uplifting 3 minutes I've had in a while. I had begun to lose hope in the "situation", then I get this IM. : ) makes me smile on the inside and out. Oh yeah, Katherine's birthday was last Thursday. No, I didn't forget, I just didn't talk about it with others. What do YOU think?? Friday, October 17, 2003
blogger has been acting kind of strange. I had a super awesomd lunch a couple days ago. It was a beautiful breezy cool day, and I was eating a pita and just talking with a friend for good 3 hours of discussion. Slowly, I'm starting to miss everyone I know in Houston. I wish I had a 3 hour lunch with the very next person to sign my guestbook. :) Hope the college apps are going well for you seniors. November 1 for early decision, no? What do YOU think?? Friday, October 10, 2003
TURN UP YOUR SPEAKERS!!! REAL SONG HERE. I LOVE DAVID CROWDER. Boot Scoot Boogie Number 2 David Crowder*Band Boot scoot boogie number 2 boot scoot boogie num Ber 2 boot scoot boogie number 2 boot scoot boo Gie number 2 boot scoot boogie number 2 Boto scoot boogie num Boo 2 boot scoot boogie, number 2 boot scoot boo Boo number 2 boo scoot boogie number 2 boot scoo Boogie… Number 2, Boot scoot boo Gie number 2, Boot scoot boogie Number 2 boot scoot boogie number 2 boot scoo Boogie num 2 boo scoo, boogie number 2 boo Scoo number 2 boo scoo, boogie number 2 Boot scoot boogie num Boo 2 boo, scoo boogie Number 2 boo, scoo boogie num Boo 2 boo, scoo boogie Number 2 boo scoot boogie number 2 Oh la,la, la, la, la boot La, la, la, la, la scoot number 2 Boot scoot boogie, number 2 Boot scoot boogie, number 2 Boot scoot boogie number, 2 boot scoot boogie num, Boot 2 boot scoot boogie num, boot 2 boot scoo boogie num Ber 2 Boo scoo Boogie number, 2 boot scoot boo Gie number 2, boot scoot boogie Number 2 boo, scoot boogie num Boot 2 boot 2, boogie number 2 Boot scoot boogie number 2 Boot scoot boogie number 2 Boo scoo… Boo la, la, la, la, la Boo scoo boogie Number 2 boo, scoot boogie num Boo 2 boo scoo, boogie number 2 Boot scoot boogie, number 2 Boot scoot boogie, number 2 Oh la, la, la, la, la, boot La, la, la, la, la, scoot Oh la, la, la, la, la Boogie number 2 ------------ What do YOU think?? Wednesday, October 01, 2003
I like my new church. I attend the Echo service, the collegiate ministry of First Evangelical Free Church, aka EV Free. It's really good. The worship is much more suitable for me (The leader has that faint hollow airy John Mayer-ish voice) and the speaker delivers very applicable messages. Speaking of which: Colossians 4:2-6 : Devote yourselves to prayer, keeping alert in it with an attitude of thanksgiving; praying that God may open up to us a door for the word, so that we may speak forth the mystery of Christ, for which I have also been imprisoned; ino rder that I may make it clear in the way I gouth to speak. Conduct yourselves with wisdom toward outsiders, making the most of the opportunity. Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned, as it were, with salt, so that you may know how you should respond to each person. Luke 6:27-38 is pretty good too. Why is it that Jesus says all these crazy seemingly impossible and almost backwards sayings?? I read it, and I'm like "That is soooo like Jesus to say that." Ut fun. midterms not. What do YOU think?? Saturday, September 13, 2003
You knowyou're a true college student when you haven't showered in 4 nights. When you wait in line for 30 minutes for 2 free hot dogs. When yo udo anything for a free T shirt. My feet smell What do YOU think?? Monday, September 08, 2003
Okay, so yesterday was Sunday, which means going to church. EXcept I'm in Austin, so that means there are two primary choices: Austin Chinese Church, or another called EVfree. I went to ACC, and...it sure was different. I expected it to be something like HCC's youth program Oxygen since Jason modeled it after Liquid (ACC's program), but it was drastically different. The atmosphere was similar as in there's no concrete structure. Pews at different angles, but with lots of room on the floor with pillows and bean bags (about 2/3 of ppl sit on floor). But the music was waayyyyy different. It's not like hcc in the way its more of a rock band leading worship. Heavy bass, lots of electric guitar, with a mixing board to integrate scratches (just like a dj). So the first set of worship I'm wondering what's going on, because I also didn't know the songs. I've done rock-ish worship before at Impact and it's fine with me to an extent, but for all the songs? Even the slow ones it seemed like a mellow mood almost like we're stoned on drugs or something. The speaker was great though. It's like having an Impact speaker speak every Sunday, that's how good he is. His name is Gideon, he's married, and I think it's his honesty that strikes everyone. The topic was about how we shouldn't let what we learn at church be contained within the church walls, that we should be coming out of church spirited with arms outstretched. Something I learned a while back about picking a spiritual home, you gotta ask four questions. What are my needs? I need a home that can provide a worshipful environment to better connect me to God and all the while discipling me to be a man of God in this crazy world full of pitfalls. How are my needs being met? What am I getting out of it? Even though the rock band worship was a slight shock, can it provide that worshipful atmosphere?? I think it can. Its not going to be HCC, only HCC is HCC, but this ministry is serving a different group, and there are different needs of them, so rock worship it is. What am I giving to it? How can God best utilize the abilities He's given me to expand his kingdom? Can I serve? And then, what more can I do?? Well, at least I can always listen to the worship music best fitting for me. I love his high speed internet. Just go to www.ksbj.org, plug in your headphones into the computer, click on "hear it now" and start listening to HOuston music and ministry. What do YOU think?? Saturday, September 06, 2003
*note to self* I hate clubbing. Too smoky. Too dark. Too loud. Can't talk. Can't hear. Lungs burn. I think girls are ugly when they smoke or hold beer bottles. Not my kind of dance. Yeah...I'll think i'll just go swing. What do YOU think?? Thursday, September 04, 2003
Okay, so I was fiddling with my radio (a non-digital kind), going through the whole range of waves, and at the very low end there's a faded classical station and a faded jazz station. My ear quickly reacted to the classics, because they were playing Tchaik's symphony #4 in F minor. For those who can't match title with sound (I can't do a lick), there was an exceprt of it last year for all state (started on a high F, then E, D, then a WHOLE run of notes), and I think the orch dorks played it for region 3 or 4 years ago. And I was sort of reliving how cool it felt to play super awesome music, waving my arms like the conductor and everything. I miss my violin, its so far away from me right now. And the ability to play nice classical music on any instrument and get passionate is something I'm yearning once again. I wish I brought a piano book with me.... Something I wish I had done when it came region time was to actually have listened to the whole piece with all the parts. I should have realized I do MUCH better when I know my function in a group. and now I think I know how stephanie felt when she missed out on region last year. What do YOU think?? Monday, September 01, 2003
*sigh* Once again in a computer lab. And since I can't find anything to do or study, I will go ahead and update. So, this weekend was fun. Came home Friday, did nothing on Saturday, but BOY Sunday was fun. Went to church at 10 and helped out in the kitchen. I've actually been hanging out there (off and on) for maybe 4-5 years?? I know in theory how to cook everything, just never got around doing it with my own hands. Anyway, I went to the college class for the second week in a row, which is sort of weird because they're mostly Rice students and I'm UT. Ahhh, bonding with the Rice students. How nice. Since me and Joseph (my cousin) won't be back for a while, it was suggested to have a sleepover of all guys at my bros Nathan and Sam's Rice dorm and just play computers. I arrive at Rice at 8:45, play some games with the guys (five in total), and then I hear something about waterballoons being thrown outside, so I go down the stairs. Kat just happened to be walking up the stairs not paying attention to the mad rush of 5 asian guys down, so I wait 'til she's in her room, call her up on the cell phone, then knock on her dorm door. Yeah..,I'm one sneaky sneaky guy. So I talked with her, we both went over to see Stephanie, we all jammed on the piano and played games, then sit down to talk. I get a phone call from the guys asking where I was. "Are you with girls??" they ask. "Two of them, actually". yeah...THAT was gonna get interesting. Long story short, I cheated of 4 of my guys with 2 girls for 3 hours. Guess who's cool now?? check out my rockin' UT schedule! What do YOU think?? Saturday, August 30, 2003
I think for Christians and non alike, this would be a very good article to read. You know what, this might have been the exact problem I had going into Camp Impact. Didn't even see it coming. Spiritual Pride. What do YOU think?? Thursday, August 28, 2003
You know what? I'm starting to feel that I don't need a computer. REally. There are plenty of 24 hour computer stations all over the campus (some are more crowded and noisy than others), and its great. Speaking of food, my diet has become very irregular. It would scare my mom lots. Like yesterday, I had ice cream for dinner, and today I had to skip lunch, but one of my classes had cookies. I'm living off sugar right now. And if you care to walk 15 minutes in the Texas heat, you can get a decent buffet meal at Kinsolving for only $2.76. How scary is that??? They giveyou $1200 for the whole year, and I can get by with on buffet meal a day. Talk about too much money wasted. If I come back with a pot-belly, feel free to poke me. I will deserve it. oh. MAN. The guys here are soooooo buff. Scary almost, them spending more time in the gym than in the books. So cut, so chizzled (sp?). Maybe I can gain weight in muscle?? I want to dunk soon. What do YOU think?? Wednesday, August 27, 2003
Wow, it's been a month since I've posted. ANyone miss me?? *pauses* *deafening silence* OH well. Sorry it's been a while, but I ran into humungo computer problems. As of right now I'm at a basement computer lab updating people. Here's my quick 5 minute rundown of colllege. I know EVERYONE here. They are either former bellaire students of various grades, or former high schoolers from the several church branches of Houston Chinese Church. How to find time for all? No clue. Walking across campus: NOT what it used to be. Food is actually good. Haven't had a chance to weigh myself, but lets just say I fluctaute between 142-145, depending what time of the day. UT, I'm here. Do your worst. What do YOU think?? Sunday, July 27, 2003
Impact was so awesome. Learned so much…experienced so much…changed so much. Trying to bloggerize all this would take a while. Almost need to split this up into chapters. I think I'll release this one chapter at a time. Chapter 1 - I'm not all that I may be cracked up to be Okay, so here's the deal. At camp, every camper gets a one-on-one time with their counselor, just a chance to get to know each other and see what's been happening. During mine, I was just talking about what I think our youth group could use improving and different college questions. Earlier Peter, my counselor, was leading a nightly group debriefing session, and he threw out two questions. 1) How are we trying to earn our salvation? 2) Do we turn our faith into a knowledge thing?? For question #1, it's hard to not try to earn our salvation. Personally, my brain knows that salvation is free, so we don't have to do anything to earn it, but there's this overhanging thought of doing stuff to justify our faith. For example, I would do a quiet time or serve at church because I'm afraid it would be hypocritical if I didn't. "hypocritical" in the sense that as a Christian, I believe God loves me so much he saved me from Hell through Jesus, but do I regard Him as the Lord and Savior of my life, or only the Savior (the One who gets me into heaven) and not Lord (the One who directs my actions/thoughts on earth). So, I guess in an attempt to make God Lord, I would try to earn it in order to genuinely say "God is at work in my life". For question #2, this is where I got worried. I raised this question during our one-on-one, and then there was this long 10 minute state of confusion, questions, brain-freeze, and zoning out. I had just been given this new perspective of my life, and it wasn't a positive one. I tried to write down all the questions I had afterward to think over, so here we go. The real question: What does this all boil down to? "this"=life, living, faith, Christianity. What's the point of our existence to God? Why did he send Jesus? Why were we created in the first place? How do we know God loves us? When I read the Bible during my quiet time, do I tap into the writings, or the writer? With the relationship with God comes knowledge, but when did it become all about the knowledge and not about all of God? "Experience God". What does that mean? How long has it been since I had "experienced God?" When was the last time real to me? At what point did Christianity, my parents' "religion", transform into my faith, my life? For the following 24 hours (I had the one-on-one talk before dinner), I was in a daze. It was a time of confusing soul searching. Whether the past x months (I don't remember when I lost touch) I've been building a relationship with God Himself or with the Book of information about God, I don't know. The distinction, the line between God and knowledge of God suddenly became a huge gray blur. Was I getting high off of knowing the fact that I acquired a new bit of knowledge, or high off of God? And when did I begin this downward turn? It's been such a gradual change I didn't see it coming. Seriously, I thought things between me and God were going well. My outlook was so positive and I had (unconsciously) focused so much on the knowledge aspect that I even tricked myself into genuinely believing things were A-ok. I mean, seriously, I was doing everything right, and I was doing it with the pure heart. The hardest part of living out this life is having the pure heart, and I truly did think at the time I had it. So during Camp it dawned very suddenly that my goal in life at that time was to be the provider of answers to all possible questions about God. If someone was shaken or unsettled about their spiritual life or their belief, I would be able to minister to their needs. If someone who was skeptical about God decided to ask dangerous questions, I would be the one to step in and tactically defend whatever attacks were made. Almost like preparing for the millionaire show. All this I would do while giving the glory to God and not myself (see how it works?? Right actions, right heart, how could I have seen I was doing this all wrong?) But during camp the simplest of all questions appeared unanswerable. What does all this boil down to, what is the point of our life? I was also asking myself "When was the last time I could truly say 'God, thanks for making me me' or 'God, I really do love you for turning my life around' " or just experience a time where God just totally wows me for being who He is. The previous camp for sure, and maybe during our winter retreat, but nothing major since. I find it depressing that God's grace and mercy grows old and almost boring with familiarity, because it really shouldn't. My intended time with God became time with the Bible, but the distinction became blurred yet still living out life "correctly". Oh, in other news, my computer is almost built. I got the silver case…but now I don't like it. Blue looks better now. Okay, well, turns out that the sony/compaq/dell equivalent of my computer costs 300-400 dollars more. So…looks like building computers is the way to go, and if anyone is in need of an inexpensive computer, I may be able to build it. Sort of depends on the OS though…if you can provide Windows XP it would be good. Building one is pretty cool. Something to keep in mind in the future. What do YOU think?? Tuesday, July 22, 2003
Quick. Whatever you think about me, whatever you've concluded about me through my essay-like posts, wipe them out from your mind. Start all over. Delete, and reboot. Check back in a few days for more details. I gotta absorb all this. What do YOU think?? Friday, July 18, 2003
Behind the scenes @ the Lin residence Something that I've noticed throughout this whole summer is that my mom is using every second trying to change me into tip-top shape for college, and its getting ANNOYING, as well as weirding me out. Almost like a Cinderella story, with every other statement starting with "Justin, can you do me a favor?", or "Clean your room", "Be less stubborn", "Do the laundry", "Go cook dinner", "Do your devotions", you know, stuff like that. We're having more of those sit-down talks of her lecturing and me listening of ten minutes or so. What's weird is that suddenly, and I do mean SUDDENLY (just this summer) she's become more "religious", for lack of better words. Not that she was ever non-religious, but she usually wouldn't exhibit her Christian-ness at home. Now that reality sets in that I'm going off to college, it seems as though she's over-exhibiting it. Some things are minor, some are more major. For example, she's suddenly using terminology such as "God-willing", "unbecomingly", and "quiet times", and generally quoting words of phrases that you know come only from the Bible and not part of everyday conversation. And not just that, there have been several occasions where the whole family would have this "prayer time", each person going in a circle praying aloud. You would think that I would enjoy this, that I would appreciate it, but actually the opposite is true. I'm more confused, and I am almost turned off by it, and it's hard to explain why. As I just mentioned, this is all so sudden. My mom has never taken charge like this before as the spiritual leader of the household, but suddenly now?? My walk with God, although turbulent with ups and downs, has been something I've worked on with the guidance of counselors and support from peers, but NEVER involved my parents. So when all this stuff comes up, I'm question why. And when my dad participates, it makes me uneasy because I don't view my dad positively. According to my mom, I'm becoming stubborn like my dad, but I don't realize it. This observation is due to our both holding to our positions on a very trivial issue. I want one thing, she wants the opposite, but I'm not budging from my position. What she doesn't know is that I can easily give in and be okay about it, but I want appear to be adamant to my resolve. Besides, its about a trivial issue, so what's the big deal? She also says I lack people skills, which I used to be but not any more. This again comes from my interactions with my siblings, who can really really get on my nerves sometimes, and so I'm a little more cold to them when they are. *sigh* Question of the day (or month, depending when I next update): Is it possible to be your real self outside the house but put on a fake self at home with family?? UT orientation was pretty good. The campus is absolutely huge. My legs get tired from all the walking. I mean, when your college has street lights…you know its gonna be huge. Nothing like Rice. Haha, the whole time everyone was making fun of the Liberal Arts people. "This just in. Employment of Liberal Arts graduates has experienced a 78% increase thanks to the grand openings of three new Super Walmarts". And wow, half of the programs aimed to create this mindset of respecting everyone else's opinion or belief. It's scary that they had to take it to such an extent. I mean, the theatrical productions were composed of a video clip followed by a soliloquy given by the type of persons. Anglos, blacks, Asians, Hispanics, Hindus, Muslims, Christians, Atheists, gays, bisexual, lesbian. I mean, really, shouldn't we all respectful and aware of all them? Just goes to show that we at Bellaire are pretty lucky students, that we can probably find all these people in the same classroom as us. WE won't have to undergo this "awareness program" UT designed. The monologues were pretty good. They were supposed to clear up some negative stereotypes about everyone, and they did a pretty good job. I liked the monologue the Christian character made. He emphasized that we're not all extreme Bible thumping evangelists, he also explained the basic theology of Christianity, and said if he ever did try to share his belief, its because it was mutual and because he believes it as true. However, the one monologue that really made me uneasy was the lesbian one. First reason being that I, being a guy, know my head should stay out of the gutter. And while keeping my head clear, I'm listening to her speech, and suddenly I hear her say "Bet you wouldn't figure that I was a protestant. Just because I love women doesn't mean that I don't love Jesus", and immediately my brain kicked into overdrive. I think that statement did more harm than good. It implied that Christianity and homosexuality is compatible, and I don't think it is. I don't have the answer to whether gay Christians are truly Christian, nor do I have the answer to whether you're born that way or if it's a choice, but to me this issue is simple. God spells out in the Bible (old testament somewhere) that this is a sin, along with instances of them being frowned upon. When you start believing in Jesus as your savior, you desire to become just like Him (perfection), know Him, and love Him, and then you slowly begin to realize how much God despises sin. So I'm going to insert a quote from one of my Sunday school teachers: "It is so very hard to hate sin, and love God". We can't truly love God if we continue to purposely do things we know is wrong and hated by God. So after the skit/play, each guy group hooked up with a girl group and we had a sort of inner/outer circle. The counselors would throw out a question regarding each issue and everyone would indicate whether they agree/disagree, and if they so choose, elaborate or comment. So when the gay issue came up, I commented about the danger in the statement the character made, other students followed with more comments, then one female student said that you don't have to believe in every part of a religion to be "devout", and she also said "The Bible has its contradictions". WHOA!!! Once she said that, I knew that if the counselors didn't jump in quick the room would have a mini civil war. Luckily they did, but it was pretty close, she almost opened one nasty can of worms. Well, I potentially open up a can of worms every time I post, but fortunately I'm doing it in a controlled environment where chaos won't be leashed. Camp Impact soon in 2 hours, from past experience I know that whatever expectations I have coming into it, God will have something 10 times better in store. I'm bringing pen/paper (something I wish I had done in years previous), and I'll post them if I see fit. What do YOU think?? Saturday, July 05, 2003
------Yeah, this is gonna get a little long----- Things I learned this weekend during my family's church fellowship retreat (last weekend): 1) Country mosquitoes itch just as much as city mosquitoes. 2) Roasted marshmallows are NOT a big deal. 3) Little kids can be VERY annoying when they're waiting to play ping-pong but they lack the ability to play well. 4) You can get multiple blisters while kayaking. 5) Tall person + short bed = achy breaky crampy knees. 6) If you are to lead worship, make sure to start practicing guitar one week beforehand in order to develop nice hard finger calluses. *ouch* 7) I am able to fall asleep on an outdoor rocking chair. 8) I suck at swimming with speed. 9) When I grow up, I have a feeling I'll be fishing. 10) There might actually be a thing called "dumb pills" that parents take when they grow older. For example, today, my dad said to my sister "Tiffany, you're too rough. One day you're going to kill your own baby!" Basically, parents take one little thing and extend it to the most extreme case ever. Enter the highway @ 45 m.p.h. and suddenly I'm a dangerous race car driver destroying the car engine. Spend a little too much time reading the sports page (15-20 minutes online) and its inevitable I'm gonna drop out of UT and earn a low-wage burger-flipping job. Forget one itty-bitty detail, he links it to an airplane mechanic forgetting to check one small thing, and then the airplane explodes. Dirty room = failure in life. Yeah, pretty irrational… 11) I have yet another explanation for my introspective/reflective/philosophical weekly posts of novel proportions. In a nutshell, when the HCC youth group had a public time during Friday fellowship of sharing how God's been working in our lives, I wouldn't be too enthusiastic to have the whole group know about it, since our group wasn't very together (we're still very cliquish, but its getting better), and it takes a little bit of trust to share anything personal. Well, this past year, several things happened. Instead of youth fellowship, we're all in separate small groups. Also, I had made friends with people of different churches whose online postings provide encouragement. Plus, I just click better with non-HCC churchgoers. And realizing this was my final year to make an impact on those around me, I had become more eager to share and make a difference. I'm going to digress a little bit. I'm scared of college. Why? I'm afraid of the lack of outreach opportunities there are in high school. As high schoolers, it seems to easy to reach out to our peers, because we're all just beginning to figure out how the world truly functions, together. Spiritual beliefs are being sought, which of them are true, which are not. Everyone is seeking, and opportunities to strike up conversation and reach out are limitless. But once you begin evangelizing and sharing your belief in hope of changing and saving a person's life, God quickly teaches you the virtue of patience, because it can be a very long process. The friendship has to be a deep enough level for both to comfortably discuss religious matters without offending one another, and getting to that level takes time (I believe this is true at any age, not just teens). But the thing about high school is that there are activities to break the ice more easily. Inviting non-believers to different church events like Friday night fellowship, broomball, or gym night is surprisingly easy. Camp Impact is the ultimate event for outreach. Even if they don't go, the ice has been broken for future church-y discussions. Beginning this senior year, I had realized that I was running out of time for outreach as well passing on words of wisdom to those younger. When I'm in college, I can't share what wisdom I've learned during 4 years of high school to my youth group. In college, I can't effectively share the Gospel or fellowship with friends scattered about the country, that I can only pray for someone to build that friendship to the level I had it and take it further and share the Gospel. In college, I fear that everyone will be more set in their ways, that their minds would be more closed. So this year, I wanted to make that lasting difference, because I had squandered many opportunities to share what God is all about. Have I? Yes, but to various extents. To my readers, it has been a privilege sharing all this with you. Using name initials (some you know, some you don't), SZ is comfortable with my churchiness, reluctant to believe, hope I can get him to go @ UT. SL and I are only good acquaintances, but we've talked a little bit about God, so I'm also hoping to build our friendship further @ UT. JL wrote in my yearbook that our friendship has made him think about considering Christianity, so I'm eager to see him @ UT. JB and I seemed to be the lone men in Christ in our group, but only acquaintances, hope our co-existence made an impact of somesort. Maybe he'll go to HCC. Really wish I got to talk more with EW this year, but things change. Hope our deep conversations of last year made a lasting impact, hope she finds a good church to go to in college, hope her friends don't corrupt her too much (Inside joke for the krz and sin). The all-wise, all-buff Jason writes: I think the American church...at least the Chinese American church...has not done her job in giving her members a real hope...a real vision...a real purpose. The utmost spiritual ambition for many of the teenagers I work with is to simply have a consistent quiet time. That's the number one prayer request...that's found on every New Year's resolution or commitment card. Our fellow journeymen see their destination as being "nice" Christians, who commit to a church, and don't sin as much as before. Is that all they hope for? I just don't see how that motivates anyone for the weighty call of discipleship. Christ is willing to give us so much more when he returns, and that's what eschatological hope is all about. He doesn't want to just improve us...he wants to fully redeem and glorify our bodies...turning the perishable into imperishable...the mortal into immortal (1 Cor. 15:54). He wants to make us like himself, so that we may fully reflect the glory of God and fulfill our original purpose (Gen 1:26). No input this time…just some food for thought. This post is pretty long (almost 2 pages in MS Word). What do YOU think?? Tuesday, June 24, 2003
Copy, paste, POST & PUBLISH! Yeah, I know that bad things happen so that we would appreciate the good times ever more. "No rainbow without rain" as one person has said it. But the thing is that in the past, "bad things" were usually comprised of poor grades, shaky friendships, or something of the mental/emotional realm of pain. I think this is the first time I've considered physical pain as God's way of bringing me back to him, because up until now, I'd rarely injured myself badly, and whenever I had, I thought of it more of a random tough luck factor and not a "I'm getting what I deserve" type of thing. Its just that this time the circumstances were heavily favorable for my mom to say something along the line of "This is just to show you to listen to me and just go swimming with your brother". Before you guys think I'm loony (Ha, probably too late), I'm usually not so, for lack of better words, "God-fearing". If I suddenly wake up in the middle of the night and my clock says 3:16 or 3:23…it's probably not a sign from God. Hey Kat, there's something about your guestbook entry that really makes me want to scratch my head, and I can't really explain it. First and foremost, you used the term "free will", and that right there can stir things up. Most of the HCC counselors try to avoid the free will vs. predestination topic, simply saying there are Bible verses that support both views. And then I remember something in Romans that speaks of God foreknowing things…and so yeah, this gets pretty crazy. But quoting the big head himself Jason (he really does have a large-sized cranium), God is sovereign and God is good. And as for my own personal teenage non-seminary schooled view point of God, I think God is infinite, and he allows us to have free will, so for whatever infinitely possible courses our life could take based on our free will, God has that number perfect plans for each course. It think it's sort of a hybrid mix of free will and God's will. One thing I am sure of is that no one will know 100% because if somehow man completely understands the infinite nature of God, God will brushed aside as one more thing man has figured out, so no longer will man need to seek God, and it may be a long shot, but God just might be smart enough to not let that happen. And what's the deal with the italicized "this" life? I thought there was just life on earth with heaven right after. Or maybe I'm just missing something. The other head-scratcher is your question whether God blesses us if we're being "good". Even though I think you're right when you say that God really wouldn't punish us intentionally, I also think that He does bless those who do "good". Can't really recall a specific verse that supports this, but somewhere in the Bible (Proverbs?) it talks about God granting wisdom to those who genuinely seek it. Jesus was blessing all sorts of people back in the day, as long as they or even their friends had faith that He could bless them if He was willing to. God's will / God's plan for us may be hard to grasp, but speaking from personal experience, it really is perfect. It may not seems so awesome at the time (especially at the low low times), but after waiting for time to pass, you suddenly see the bigger picture and realize how awesome it is. For me, looking back, I have seen why God had done things that seemed terrible at the time it happened. Why I went to ghetto Pershing. Why I did majorly majorly bad in Spanish 3. Why peers suddenly went guy/girl crazy junior year. Even last week's sprained ankle, seeming to be more and more coincidental, has made me think and type up all these thoughts. And then there are some things that seemed sort of neutral but sprouted into something BIG. Orchestra has done wonders. This blog has done wonders. Going to Camp Impact has paid HUGE and unimaginable dividends. Taking choir senior year (in spite of my mom's discouragement) has done wonders. Almost done here. Now on the topic of "divine intervention", Friday was pre-camp rally. During worship, the electricity went out. One second, the speakers were blasting the voices from microphones and electric guitars, and the next second the speakers don't work anymore. Something I found encouraging was that the team kept going, and it just totally reinforced the fact that true worship doesn't even need electricity. During that 7 minute period stripped of electricity, worship became more real, and less hype, for myself at least. Sign from God? Possibly. Camp Impact registration deadline without paying a $15 late fee: T-minus 14 days. Your going is highly suggested. Be A Part of Something Bigger. What do YOU think?? Monday, June 16, 2003
For once, I'm writing this on the IE and not MS Word. Yay, SPURS up the Nets and win. I've always liked David Robinson, and here's why. There was also Robinson the different kind of athlete. The one who attended the U.S. Naval Academy, served a two-year hitch in the military after graduation and always was the officer and the gentleman. He quoted Scripture. He talked openly about his religious beliefs. Other professional athletes chased women and cars and fame; he has always pursued higher things. Like trying to make the world a better place to live by contributing his money and his time to the community. "I've been inspired by David Robinson," said first-year Spur Stephen Jackson. "I spent a year around him and he taught me how to be a man." Can you get a higher compliment? And another thing that has been really bugging me, like consuming my energy to figure it out. Do you guys think God punishes those who aren't in line or in check?? When something bad happens to somone, they would say something like "oh, this must be God punishing for doing xoxox for so long", and I'm thinking whether that's true or not. I know God is a God of both love and wrath, but is He wrathful enough to throw speedbumps in life to get our attention? Okay, so it was Wednesday evening, and my family were going to the gym. My mom was bugging me and bugging me about going swimming as my exercise, and I kept saying that basketball would be my form of exercise, so we were both a little bit stand-off-ish. So I'm playing ball, and the guys fakes me, I jump, he sort of clips under me, so now I'm flipping in the air. I'm flipping and falling, so I do a little handstand to prevent my neck from snapping in two, but the rotational momentum (big words) carries my legs/feet down, and I turn my ankle. Although my mom wasn't totally rubbing it in on the way home, it was one of those "I told you so " kind of deals. That night, I seriously couldn't sleep for an hour because the ankle actually hurt, and I spent most of that time thinking about what happened. I had not exactly been abiding in Him the best way I could, so was that God's wake up call? I'm still trying to figure it out. Basically, I'm trying to discern whether this is God's form of disciplinary action (I don't think punishment is the right term anymore), or God had no hand in it. Or maybe its one of those things where God doesn't cause it, but He knows its coming and allows it to happena nyways? (See, I can seriously give myself headaches given enough time to think all out). ANother thing. HCC has been doing a sermon series on the Sermon on the mount. Right now we started Chapter 6, and the basic theme is the discipline of secrecy. Today, we actually had the worship team behind the youth instead of in front of them so that their presence wouldn't be a distraction to us (which I think is a great idea). So Jason threw out the question of why we do things? Do we do it for the sake of receiving applause from man (like the pharisees/scribes), or in secret where God is our primary audience? I then cross apply to all those bloggers out there. Why do we do this? Why do I do this? The tough part of answering that question is that part of the act of glorifying God through online sharing and fellowship comes with the inherent attention it gathers from the online audience, and then suddenly pride comes into play. Because I can easily start making up stories or borrowing a friend's testimony here and basically say things that boost my appearance and yet its all fake. This blog thing is a dangerous thing. "With great power comes great responsibility" says Spiderman. Its true. Especially when blogging these types of things, falsifying claims is a very dangerous trap. Jason can do it easily because being a leader and drawing attention is part of his job description. As for me...it's a gray area which I'm trying to figure uot. What do YOU think?? Friday, June 13, 2003
What do YOU think?? Wednesday, June 11, 2003
In an attempt to not repeat what I've earlier said in regards to this topic, I will try to give my input to Johnny's letter. Things that must be understood: At Camp Impact there are numerous workshops to take. He and I both took the X-Men workshop, where we learned that the two main sins guys struggle with are pride and lust. The lust topic apparently hit home with Johnny. Also at Impact, you're in a small group of all guys or all girls with a counselor, and the group just debriefs about the day. I was in Johnny's small group too, and our counselor was just married, maybe 2 months into it. Trust me when I say this, but girls are a HUGE topic of discussion among the guys at Impact. Last year a couple girls were talking with the speaker after service about relationships, and after 20 minutes passed, a whole crowd gathered. Basically, whenever counselors talk about relationship, they automatically turn into Jesus; the youth are thirsting for wisdom in this area. Well anyway, we both learned something last year and were hugely touched and changed and Impacted us. The relationship with God takes priority over every other relationship, including those with girls. If you can't handle yours with God, the chances of having a mature one with a girl is zero. Lust is a sin of the heart. Something our counselor told us was that after he was married he and his wife were talking, and the conversation somehow shifted so that he came completely clean about his past (and present) struggle with lust. You know what happened? She started crying. Crying. Crying. The love of his life was crying and it was about him and there was nothing he could do about it. That totally hit home to all the guys. I've seen friends cry, and it sucks. I've seen the girl(s) I've liked before cry, and it is even more saddening, hurtful, distressing, almost enraging. So I'm imagining my future wife hurt, crying because of my thoughts and my actions growing up…and it's convicting. Compelling. For Johnny and I both, I think we're both like "there is NO way I'm gonna allow that to happen if I can help it". As youth, relationships with girls are dangerous for they can cause the relationship with God to suffer as well as future pain for the future true love. Okay, so that's the background info on Johnny's post (as well as a good sell for Camp Impact). There is so much to learn at Camp Impact, everyone should go. Now back to my input. The whole letter was nice. Liking a girl but not going out with her because you know its not going to work out for the best and yet still trying to maintain a "we're just friends" friendship…I know what that's like. Can be very stressing on your heart, can easily drive you crazy. As for his afterthought: Guys going to church for girls? I don't know, that seems to be a stretch there (at least for my youth group). Maybe its just WHCC guys, they're just girl crazy. And I have no clue how to consciously or subconsciously hit in a girl. Haha, maybe I'm just weird. And not going to a dance with the girl I like?? Don't really understand the full logic of it…but I'm sure it is sound. If Jason Tarn advises that, then I'd follow it too. And yes, he is pimp, buff, wise, charming, and he is the boyfriend of the very cute Theresa Fong. I agree with the advice of being Mr. Perfect before pursuing Mrs. Perfect. And the last paragraph is true. All of it. Wow. it's been two weeks and then I bust out with this. What do YOU think?? Monday, June 09, 2003
*sniff* This is so moving. click! It's somewhat long, but I think it would be good to read every word. I can so relate to Johnny. So cool. His strive for wisdom is unparalleled. He does a very decent job too...very clear in his words. What do YOU think?? Tuesday, May 27, 2003
What a nice weekend. First, I got contacts!!! Putting them in is quite the experience. I was late to church by like 20 minutes. And I think I look funny, for I'm not used to my appearnace without glasses. So I just skipped service and went to the kitchen to help cook. Now that I'm 18, the elders aren't as reluctant to let me fry some rice on a wok over a huge fire. It's hard stuff though, because after one batch of it my wrists were crazy tired. I don't know how the regulars do it. Pool party at June's house was so-so. Just a lot of guys dunking everyone, and I was too unsure with my contacts what I could do, so I wasn't as active as everyone else. I did end up hitting Ericka square on the head with a waterbomb. Haha, I was a ways off from the pool, and I launched a high-archer. She didn't know who hit her, all she saw was Johnny and I grinning like fools and looking at each other. Johnny got blamed for it, but its all good. It's almost too bad she didn't make a bigger deal about it. Dance was okay. I think all the seniors are finally realizing that we’re going off on our own separate ways soon. There were several groups of two who had their own extended periods of closeness, most noticeable were Albert/Julie. Haha on them. And yet...it was kind of sad too. On Monday I saw X2. Super awesome!!! I can’t wait for X3 to come out…I just know it. PHOENIX SAGA! And I got sick too. = ( Apparently I wasn’t the only one, Kat seems to have gotten sick as well. Being sick is not a fun thing, I realized. What do YOU think?? Tuesday, May 20, 2003
Man, now that AP's are over and yearbooks out, I feel all reflective now. So I'm going to give a bloggerized final few words to my oh so wonderful readers. When I first made this, I didn't really want to. I've always wanted to be unique, and not join the masses in fads unless the fads were actually worthwhile. I eventually succumbed to my peers, and so my initial purpose was to connect myself to people, anyone really. I would ramble about my day (which I now find boring. Who wants to read a personal schedule??), but I had a separate secondary blog for super deep thoughts. Well, ends up no one clicked on the pure nard link, so I finally decided to bring out the deepness onto the Justin Chronicles. And looking back on it, this blog is truly a Chronicle of what I've gone through. The newly defined purpose of this blog was to create an open and clear window into my mind/emotions for people, if they so wanted or cared, to witness who Justin was beyond his glasses and messy hair you see at school. I didn't spam my link; it was in my AIM profile, and those who bothered to check it found me out. I didn't want people to feel obligated to read it, those who want to read will read it. Although I am somewhat disappointed in the people who I figured in the beginning would read my page but apparently either 1) Know I have a site, but don't bother to read me or 2) don't know I have a site, it's okay. I am grateful for the few who actually do read and sign my guestbook. You people are great. You've witnessed inner parts of me that I don't externally express at school. I wanted to be different with my blog. Knowing I wouldn't attract people by the masses, I wanted to real and open and I guess be an example to those who read it. In the darkness, I wanted to be the light. In despair, I wanted to be hope. In negativity, I would be positive. Not trying to inflate myself or anything, but I wanted to make a positive impact to those reading my material. Kat, Steph, and Alice, I hope you all found my stuff deep, insightful, thought provoking. Hard to believe, but Justin actually does get sad/distressed at rare occasions. Although it seems pretty lame, I'm glad this website has made us more comfortable around each other and with our faith. Ever hear the phrase "Everyone needs a Paul and a Timothy"? A Paul would be an elder mentor, while a Timothy would be a prospective student. Kind of like Yoda and Luke Skywalker. I've got my Paul at church, but I thought it would be awesome if somehow I could be a Paul to someone at school (if not a Paul, at least an equal). I look around at school, searching for an "ally", so to speak, someone who I can talk to or someone who's got my back in the school zone of spiritual warfare, and I think I've found several. It's weird how I can so easily bond with classmates who live by the Word…there's just something intriguing about them. Linda, I don't know if you understand even half of my God-related stuff on here, but it is my hope that one day you would fully understand how real God is. I know Jonathan has dropped by at least once or twice, and I'm glad he's found my material worthy to be mentioned in his own blog. Supposedly, I have two readers in Las Vegas who were hooked by my relationship posts. Well, glad I helped them get into a guy's head about these matters. Quentin has dropped by once or twice also, thanks for signing my guestbook. My big yearbook entry for all, in my blog. I prewrite this stuff on Microsoft Word, and the words website, guestbook, and blog are all considered misspelled. Pretty funny stuff, this thing is 7 years old. What do YOU think?? Monday, May 19, 2003
HEY FATTY McFAT FAT!!!! Me, a pimp?? Hardly. WE both know that I greatly lack the womanizing abilities that those super suave W guys have. Happy Nard to you too. Hey, I read your Word page and XANGA too. See you around in the summer. Speaking of which... EVERYONE GO TO CAMP IMPACT JULY 18-22. I am sooo excited about it. If you don't get a registration brochure from me or someone else, punch me, and I'll get you one. IMPACT!!! Oh, and I'm gonna come up with something nice and reflective of the whole year soon...like a universal yearbook entry. What do YOU think?? Tuesday, May 13, 2003
Lala...as you may have noticed, I was impressed by everyone's appearance at prom. Courtesy of partypics, one more picture of me (too bad I didn't know the camera guy was taking the picture) 
These pics are only good for another 27 days before partypics takes them down. Better save them on my comptuer. What do YOU think?? I forgot about Linda!! She didn't go to prom this year. Okay, just for her, I'll give a quick recap. 4:30 - Chillin' at my computer, waiting to get dressed, and a car honks outside my house. Naturally, I freak out because I hadn't even started on my hair. Turns out to be a false alarm. 5:15 - Hair gelled, all dressed, and two beautiful ladies (pictured below) pick me up :) . After 45 minutes of traffic and detours, we end up at Maggianos. 6:30 - Everyone finally arrives @ Maggianos. Truly and honestly, all the ladies could not have been more pretty. Guys in tuxes are always spiffy. The food was SO GOOD!!! My favorites were the fried kalamari and salmon. THE SALMON!!! It was soo tender, I don't even think you could have picked it up with chopsticks without it falling apart. Quentin and I were the pigs of the table, but eventually we filled up. After dinner and picture takings, the guys and dolls went to Oshmans. HAHa, that was pretty hilarious. Prom dresses and tuxes at a sports store. 9:00 - Prom. Good music. Bad food. Finally saw some of the other dinner groups, and they looked gorgeous as well. Danced with … My date Katherine, who taught me "salsa" dancing Chandra, who looked great in her dress and really knew how to dance. REALLY Ericka, who I thought was the prettiest looking after Katherine ;) Stephanie N (her dress was so cool. Touching the dress felt so nice, so smooth and slick) Nadia (she looked so different. Couldn't tell it was her at first) Alice (Hi Alice!!! I just couldn't NOT give dancewith you, right??) For the juniors out there, just know that dates for prom serve two functions. 1) Prom picture and 2) Primary dancing partner (and I gots me a good one). After prom was only okay. I didn't gamble to get more raffle tickets, but I did win an old navy gift card. I owned the bungee cord thing. Sucks that I was too late to sing karaoke. Pizza good, breakfast okay. What do YOU think?? Monday, May 12, 2003
What do YOU think?? Sunday, May 11, 2003
OKay, since all of my beloved readers went to prom, details won't really be needed. Just gotta remember (for myself)Maggiano's has the best salmon, and QUentin and I were the pigs of our group. DAnced with the ladiesI wanted to dance with. Won an old navy gift card. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH I wonder if anyone reads this. Oh well. A big thanks to Katherine Zodrow for being such a wonderful prom date!! It was fun. weee. I'm out What do YOU think?? Tuesday, May 06, 2003
What do YOU think?? Friday, May 02, 2003
OMGOMG OMG!!!! Okay...compose yourself. Okay? okay. I go to Houston Chinese Church. Our youth group 6-12 grade is about 100-120. Our youth director is Jason Tarn, and HE HAS A XANGA!!!. You think I go deep? Jason is so much more a man than I am...I bet he's gonna go WAY deep. Okay...all is well. What do YOU think?? Thursday, May 01, 2003
Wow…For the first time in a long time I've had multiple (two or three) "real" AIM convos in within a week. It was actually weird at first because when the window popped up my mind sort of froze. You know that awkward feeling when someone says "hey" and you say "hey" back, but you have nothing significant worth discussing, so the convo sort of fizzles? I fear that, which is partially why I don't talk much online (along with my fluctuating online hours). It had been so long I almost forgot how to not end up with a "fizzled" convo. For me, AIM is to be there for someone who is in need, not for me to spontaneously ask people "wssup" and chit-chat for only 3 minutes because the other person didn't feel like talking. Okay, onto other matters…as you guys may or may not know, I'm the violin guy in the Jazz combo, and we've had several courtyard performances. Something I find oddly funny is that every time a couple or a trio of people from my lunch group wander off together and I can see them meander in my direction, but they probably don't realize that I'm the guy jazzin' it up on the strings. So they're chatting, oblivious to who's playing the music, and I'm sitting, playing, and staring at them talk, just wondering what was so important that they left the group. Funny… I'm sort of leap frogging in my topics here. The issue of friendship seems to have arisen yet again. Oh wait, before I go on, I want to confess that I totally suck at translating my thoughts into words. It's so clear in my head, but once I type them into words, the thing I'm trying to convey always ends up .. not right and offensive. And I mean always. I spend a lot of time thinking how I should phrase everything so I could be more tactful and not offend anyone. I've been burned enough times to know that I have to be gentle and thoughtful in my words. Okay, back to friends. What to do with friends you've lost touch with? Much previously, I had a super selfless mentality of it, like keep giving without regard to whether they will give back . Well, my thoughts have been modified slightly. Still be selfless, caring, and sacrificial as a good friend would (even when the favor isn't returned), but don't push yourself to the limit that your mind rips apart, and you're overcome by it. I'm not saying to totally deny everyone who comes your way, but you have to know your own limits of how much sacrifice you can make for others before your own life is severely affected. For example, I just can't answer "no" to anyone. If anyone anytime needs help, I would most likely drop everything without thinking just to help out the person. But sometimes the help someone needs is too much for me to provide, but since I don't want to hurt the person's feelings and be selfish I often say "yes" and dig myself into a hole too deep for me to get out, thus screwing up my own plans (for ex, prom dates - it was really hard for me to say no to someone). You have to know your limits. Sometimes you just have to say "I'm sorry, I can't", and in the same way, some friends you'll eventually have to let go. That's what I mean by selfless. Make the appropriate sacrifices. (of course, what's "appropriate" is on a case by case basis) La dee da…I dislike it when I sound all preachy. Because once it sounds preachy, it is inherent there is a "holier than thou" pride, and that's something I try to avoid at all costs. I am nowhere near the man I want to be, but my main goal of this blog is to make it glorifying to God alone, and definitely not boost myself. I will try to boast in my weaknesses alone, and not exalt myself. Speaking of God's glory, Johnny is totally on the mark. His strive for purity is so... refreshing. Mad props to him. A male adolescent desiring not to be lustful is like a fat kid trying not to be out playing dodgeball. I like Johnny's approach to dancing One last thing: I’m due for an eye checkup. Should I get better glasses, or get some contacts? Give me your thoughts, all *counts on one hand* 5 of you. P.S. Steph, sorry about the it thing. Wish I could have helped. What do YOU think?? Sunday, April 27, 2003
Don't become friends with people too popular. To them you're disposable and you won't be missed. ~ Sam Feng. Found this in his profile...and when you come to think of it...it's so very true. Really. I'm not gonna go deep this time, but you guys should have some idea of where I stand here...and I'm asking you guys to just think about this statement. It may come very useful in college. Ever feel like you've been disposed of?? What do YOU think?? Friday, April 25, 2003
YOu guys remember my friend Johnny? I had just read his site for the first time in months, and I must say this guy is truly representin' God. Big time. An exceprt from his March 10th entry that I feel is appropriate in here as well. Disclaimer: Fast Forward...J Lin= Sinner: lustful, prideful, and selfish. Anyone reading this please don't take my entries as if im preaching or trying to act "Godly" or "Holy." I have many flaws and fallen short from the glory of God. My entries are my own personal diary to remind me what've i learned so i may stop acting the way i shouldn't be, and if people wanna read thats fine. But please dont think im trying to shove my agenda down your throat. If you do think that, i believe thats your own personal guilt trying to tell you something. I have taken a hiatus from Xanga because i realized my posts weren't glorifying to God, which was my initial reason for even starting one. Life comes down to just two things: That's to know Jesus and to make him known. So from this day forth...Being Johnny Lin = God's Glory. Let the persecution/"comments" come. Man, the thing about Bellaire is that we don't get persecuted at all. That's good, but also pretty bad in a way. We haven't been tested at all. Except for Sam and maybe Albert calling me "Jesus", that's pretty much it for persecution. Well, anyways, skim through his site from march 10 on, it's pretty good. Get into the head of a descent man representin'. What do YOU think?? Hmmm…it's been a while since I've been here. Time for a real quick catch-up of what's been happenin' the past couple weeks. New Orleans trip = fun. Lots of food, shopping, walking. I liked it a lot. Sorry, no details this time. Orchestra courtyard concert went surprisingly well. I saw more Asian people than tree people, so That was a good sign. I had my shades, the wind was blowing, all in all a descent performance. This past four-day weekend was a blast. I got to cook a couple lunch and dinners for the family (which I haven't done in ages). I like cooking. Cooking is my friend. So is eating. I cooked this nice chicken soup (with raw chicken meat and bones, none of that canned stuff) and it tasted really good. Also cooked this Chinese sticky rice dish, which was sort of like fried rice except the rice sticks together, and there's more soy sauce and other goodies in it. Much better than the restaurants, I must say. If you guys want recipes, ask me! Easter Sunday was good for me, I guess. Read a couple blog entries already about how they didn't have that "Easter spirit", if there is such a thing. I am glad to know that people do care about their mental/spiritual readiness for the most significant holiday on the Christian calendar, but does it really matter? Oh wait, let me rephrase that question: Is your heart not prepared if you don't feel the "warm tinglies" you expect to feel? Yes, Easter commemorates a very life-changing, life-saving event, but just because you don't "feel" it doesn't necessarily mean there's a lack of faith involved. For instance, I didn't completely tear up with sadness on Friday, nor did I tear up with joy on Sunday, but I know that I have faith. Faith isn't an emotion, isn't knowledge, isn't an experience, but faith to me is "the facilitator of human to holy" <------- (straight from my notes. Pretty good, huh?) I can write a whole bunch more about faith, but I think I'll stop right there. Just felt like giving some feedback as to the slight "sadness" that people thought they were having just because they weren't "into" it enough. ----------------------------------------------- I like blogging. It serves as a useful outlet for me to express my spiritual/religious thoughts that I wouldn't be able to share at school. Not that I'm ashamed or uncomfortable discussing such topics, its just that I can never steer the conversations toward these areas. A question I think I'll just throw out there for the sake of discussion. I've always wondered whether the differences in Catholicism and Protestantism (differences that I have very little insight about) makes any difference to God. Okay, now for the less serious, and much more comical stuff. Ends with a 'M', starts with a 'P', and has a backwards "or" in the middle. The dateless blunders of our senior class (myself included, for now) are behaving quite amusingly as of late. Getting desperate for dates (which we all know is just as important as … going deer hunting with an accordian), and I'm just sitting back and smiling. Yours truly seems to be creating a bit of chatter out there in the social world (which is a FIRST (really, I think it is a first (what's with all these parenthesis within (parenthesis) (reminds me of stream of conciousness ( I'm hungry, I'm funny, AND funny looking)))). My name has popped up on the social radar screen I think. Word has it that Justin Lin, man of mystery, is currently without a prom date. To set the public record straight, after my first prospect was intercepted by another, and after I'd decided that my second choice wasn't really worth the trouble of securing, I decided to sit back, relax, and take my good ol' sweet time and relish my time as one of a few guys still up for grabs. ***page break*** The show I've witnessed was hilarious. It all started about a week ago. First, my mom, with whom I don't discuss girl stuff, asks whether I have a date or not to prom. I say no, and then she suggests that I go with ----- --, the same ----- -- who she thought I should have also taken to Red and White. Fill in the blanks, and for an extra hint, she likes this girl so much she said she would happily pay the $25 for her to go with me. o_O Second, people all around have been dropping hints here and there, everywhere, as to who I should ask. I unfortunately said no to a very fine lady who I thought already had a prom date secured, and then EVERYONE makes this "huge" deal about asking "Why not, Why not, Why not" and whatnot (yes, I do realize its all in good fun). Then today, during lunch, some girl I know of suggests out of the blue that I should go with Anushree, WHICH I also thought was pretty funny. Out of nowhere, "justin, do you have a prom date?" "no" "you should go with anushree" yeah, the time is coming soon, I was hoping not to show my hand until the last moment (hey, I like playing it cool, calm, collected, unfazed, and I like the suspense others feel), but I think I let the cat out of the bag a little too early to a person or two, so my enjoyable show is almost over. Why do I post this stuff at 1 or 2 in the morning? One phone line, one procrastinating younger brother, one chatty younger sister, one dad who believes internet is only good for news and research, and I possess the slowest computer of the house, so slow I had to disable animation, sounds, videos, and pictures. On the plus side, the infamous "stephanie" hasn't left a note in my guestbook yet, and disabled pics mean I won't get in trouble for anything. : ) What do YOU think?? Wednesday, April 23, 2003
I promise, I'll update within the next two days. A couple dates to shout out. May 2 - Friday - Larissa Lam in Concert @ Houston Chinese Church. Free evangelistic concert, so GO!!! July 18-22 - CAMP IMPACT - No way any of you guys are missing out on this. I don't care if you're Asian, polish, or some mix inbetween, you WILL keep that date clear for Camp Impact. DO IT!!! What do YOU think?? Friday, April 04, 2003
Fat Can wrote this one. Mad props to her. Short, concise, and articulate. I guess I just wanted to jot down some things that have been going through my mind regarding what I believe in and faith. Maybe just to keep this on file just in case I feel directionless one day. What kind of faith breaks the hardest of hearts. What kind of ‘religion’ gives people a joy that never diminishes, a love that never fails, an incomprehensible strength. Is there any ‘religion’ that makes a convict, charged for killing so many people, repent and make a 180 in his life even though he’s on death row?.. a religion that gives men and women the courage and the audacity to hold bible studies in their houses, risking torture and death if caught? If you ask me, I don’t think any ‘religion’ could ever have that kind of impact. It’s a relationship…a relationship with the Father that compels these people to change their hearts, to follow Him with a perseverance that seems not diminishable. It seems like the umbrella of ‘Christianity’ has long covered a mass of people that are not unified, that do not all share the same belief. There’s so much more to Christianity than just following some rules, sitting in service on Sundays and being an overall good person. Our main goal in life is to experience the greatness of God’s love for us through Christ’s crucifixion, and then tell people about it out of genuine concern and compassion. I feel like some Christians, including myself, have lost the compassion for ones who are not saved. I guess I realized it’s not our job to scare people into believing in God just so they can go to heaven. It’s to show them that God’s heart is for them to be wedded to Christ… for them to taste His goodness.. delight in His riches. As for the many questions that don’t seem to be capable of answering, have faith. Faith is not by any means a scapegoat for all the things that we can not explain, but trusting that God intended the best outcome through everything He did, everything He’s done so far, as well as things He will do. “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of MANY kinds, because you know that the TESTING OF YOUR FAITH develops PERSEVERANCE. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” So I guess I jotted down these things to help me think through what exactly gives me a reason for living.. made me remember how sweet love is, but also how disappointing sin is. God is a just God. When we sin, He isn’t happy, but when we sin but repent, His arms open to embrace us, because He truly loves us. There isn’t anything more constant in my life than God the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. Expect me to elaborate on this in the near future. stuff in bold is what stands out to me What do YOU think?? Tuesday, April 01, 2003
Okay, so after rereading my massive post, I have come to the conclusion that I was either drunk on water or high on fermented tofu. One or the other, I wasn't myself. Although all that I typed up is still true, I think I was just overreacting. Plus, my expectations of people are a bit too high. When I wrote that post, my mentality of who a friend was was a person's whose soul is knit to your soul, sharing an almost inseparable bond. Yeah, obviously that standard is a wee bit overshooting it. I know people like to be recognized and mentioned in people's blogs. For me, I try to give people credit where credit is due, so now A WHOLE PARAGRAPH devoted to Katherine: You're right. A lot of what you said makes sense. You're right, you DO know I'm not Catholic. =) Haha, seriously though, just because I'm uncomfortable sharing specific details with the people around me, that doesn't mean they're not my friends. They are good, decent people, and if I'm ever in a crisis (rare, but not impossible) I'm sure they would do everything in their power to help me out. And…if I'm not mistaken, you've just commented for the first time about God stuff. It's encouraging to know that lent to you is not just some ritual/tradition thing you do once a year, that you know what lent is all about and why you take part in it. Quick note I want to add (from my protestant point of view of course :P) - We shouldn't have to rely on an annual thing (such as lent) to get our spiritual act together. To me, it's something we should be concerned with daily, so when we start falling away from Him, we should fix it then and there, and not rely on lent to turn things around. Yeah, so I got friends, I just had to change my expectations to realize they're more than just acquaintences. Also had to stop overthinking and overanalyzing things. Other related stuff I realized: Brotherhood and sisterhood are very important. Some things are just not meant to be discussed with the other gender. Also, I've discovered one more reason not to date in high school. People change. The friend you know now may be a different person the same time next year, or even YOU may be the one changing. And, I think I've figured out what healthy relationships with girls are like. Not too too close, yet still social and mutually caring. One more thing: Being the recipient of encourage-o-grams, hoopin' with guys afterschool, sharing really really deep stuff with people…it's all so NEW to me…and I LIKE it. AND…for extra clarification - I don't care if I don't get a prom date, I care about keeping my friends. What do YOU think?? Monday, March 31, 2003
Ladies and gentlemen, you've just witnessed one of my super rare 24 hour spells of mental unsettlement. The tempest in my mind has past, and sunny skies are in the forecast. Good day. What do YOU think?? ***I've never been too negative before, but I think this may be the first time I've expressed any real venting before to any school friends. So yeah, long post ahead. *sigh* Where to begin?? Oh, I know. How about PROM?? Well, I find out that my first choice for a date has been asked already, and my second choice has lost her appeal lately…so I'm sort of kicking myself for delaying my asking for so long. Prom has totally made my life much more …complicated. I just feel a little crappy right now. <-----(For those who haven't noticed, the term 'crappy' is the strongest term of displeasure you'll see me use. So if you here me utter the word 'crap', just know I'm really disturbed) Seriously, in all fairness, Prom really isn't my main problem. I could go without a date, and (I think) I would be fine. I'm going to be in a big group anyways, and so I'll dance with the people I want to dance with, not a problem. The thing about prom that’s made me feel like crap is all the stuff that’s implicated with it. The date thing: I could care less about a date. What prom does to this date thing is that I want to go with a good friend, but I am forced to face the fact that have none anymore. What close companionship I had junior year with my first choice is nearly all gone. Prom has caused this problem to resurface, a problem I've tried to keep concealed for a good while now. I'm hurting. I've been hurting for a while. All of senior year I've been desperately searching for a best friend, a sidekick, a person I can be buddy-buddy with, but I've come up empty. The last time I can honestly say I had two best friends at school was at the end of junior year. That's 10 months ago. What I have currently pales in comparison to before. It sucks. Okay, so prom is giving me some mental anguish because of this problem that's resurfaced, me lacking close friends. It's been painful, but I think the way I handle pain just makes it worse. Problems/conflicts are just like a wound. The way most people handle it is by biting the bullet, taking the pain, and rely on friends to support them. Well, not me. I'm a weirdo. The instant I feel hurt/pain/insulted/discouraged/sad/angry, I suppress it. It's like my body instantly releases its own painkiller, but it does so naturally. I think it's because I trained myself to always be positive, and whatever negativity that comes my way is masked. But I mask it so well now. So the major wound that I've had all senior year has been festering within me, but I can't feel it grow worse because of my retarded ability to not get myself hurt. Apparently, prom is the straw that broke the camel's back, because I've either run out of painkillers, or I'm willingly letting myself feel the pain. A wound unfelt is a wound unhealed. Isn't that the truth? I've always thought I could get the best of worlds by appearing positive, and letting the wound just disappear into the wind. Well, looks like I found the limit. I really do NOT want to act unbecomingly, I do NOT want to, but I think all the bitterness, sadness, anger is spawning from that lost friendship with that one particular person, and…do I dare say it? I don't think it's my fault. I think I've done what I could to maintain an acquaintanceship, at the least, but nothing's happened. For me, this is NOT a "where were you when I needed you" type of problem, this is more of a "I've been waiting for you to come around since summer, but you're still not here. Where are you?" kind of deal. I've been trying my best to not desire anything in return for my caring/concern/interest, but it appears my tank of selflessness has run dry recently, and the emotions that was kept numbed and at bay are emerging. Dang, I really miss that lost friendship. It's so weird. I see her, and I wonder what significance I am to her. I can't believe I just said that about her, but unfortunately I think it's true…it's like whatever real friendship we had going was just a memory of the past (I've actually saved multiple AIM convos with her on my comp). Now I get lucky if we hold any AIM conversation at all (we've only had like 4 this senior year). How enCRAPulating. Is it me, or is it her? In the secret, in the quiet place… I find myself singing this a lot lately. It really has a deeper meaning to me now. At school, I'm always in my secret, quiet place, even when I'm surrounded by people. Is it her??? To sum up my long rambling…prom has just made me realize, again, my lack of friends at school. It hurts. My first choice of date, who has been taken, is one who I haven't really talked with all year, and communication is a foundation for friendships, right? Wow. I just realized something. Seriously. Honestly. I just read over my quote "I've been waiting for you…" and I now I know how God feels. How many times have I neglected to talk to Him? How many times have I rejected dates with God? How many times have I put schoolwork, games, television, and the internet ahead of spending time with Him? How many times have I spent 30 minutes reading people's blogs, but 0 minutes reading His blog, the Bible? How many times has He tried to get through my head "Justin, I've saved your life. Shouldn't you be getting you priorities straight?" I find it amazing that though I have displeased Him so many many times, He's still there. Waiting. With open arms. Like a shepherd whose found the missing sheep. Like a Father whose prodigal son has returned. Well, it's not like this thought/concept is new to me. I've learned it before, many times, but with time you grow too familiar of the greatness of God's love. He's so selfless, and we should be the same. Now my mind's gone crazy. I mind knows that the right thing to do is to keep up that selfless mentality, but all my emotions just want to stay bitter and/or demand an explanation for why this has all happened. *sigh* Whatever I choose, I better lay off my natural painkillers and start healing. Speaking of healing, I've tried a lot of things. Obviously, just isolating my emotions from myself doesn't work. I've looked in the Bible, but so far I haven't a particular passage that specifically deals with this. All I'm drawing is that I should live in a manner worthy of imitation. I know that my reliance should be on Him alone, that my life is all for His glory, not mine, but what happens when His will seems to be the hardest path to follow, almost too hard to endure? Oh well, gotta keep trying anyways. One person who I know I could count on: Allen. Thanks for talking to me today. I really needed it. Today just reinforced my belief that we truly are brothers in it for the long haul. This whole post may seem contradictory to the previous 3 entries, but keep in mind that the people who are linked are people whose life I want to be part of. It may not be true the other way around. As for not being concerned with people reciprocating my compassion…it bothers me. A lot. But, to the best of my ability, I still won't be asking for anything in return. If they will, then they will. If not, then oh well. Awww…crap, have I become victim number #5 of it? Does my situation qualify as an IT situation? If you guys have questions, ask them, but please don't be offended if I don't answer them. It's not that I don't trust you, its just that…well, the friendship may not reached the level for me to reveal the deep stuff. Hope you enjoyed the cruise, Stephanie. Have you figured out who I'm talking about YET? It's almost as if I WANT you to know who I am referring to. That way I can actually talk about this to someone who is a part of my circle of friends. What the heck. Might as well. Jonathan, if you're reading this, and you want an opportunity for us to hold maybe our first decent verbal dialogue, drop me a note. You probably know more about this than you think you know. The mask, off. The cover-up, no more. My problems, exposed. I'm keepin' it real. I only fear that this will just make things worse. *sigh* Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full at his wonderful face. The things of the earth grow strangely dim In the light of His glory and grace What do YOU think?? Friday, March 28, 2003
In the secret, in the quiet place. In the stillness You are there. In the secret, in the quiet hour I wait only for you Because I want to know You more. I want to know You. I want to hear Your voice. I want to know You more. I want to touch You. I want to see Your face. I want to know You more. I am reaching for the higest goal that I might receive the prize. Pressing onward, pushing every hindrance aside out of my way. Because I want to know You more. What do YOU think?? Tuesday, March 25, 2003
Awwww....man....I've just made my brief blog rounds of the night, and I just wrote the previous post, and now I feel all sappy and mushy inside. *sigh* Oh well...mostly girls read my page anyways. Doesn't matter. Jonathan...you're all right. What do YOU think?? Affirmation, part 1 of 1. Okay, I haven't touched the table on the right for so long I think it needs a makeover. So, what better way to do it than getting rid of some links, and adding some new ones, and for the heck of it explain why they get to be honored on my site. Steph - One cool person who plays one mean fiddle. Goes crazy on the (!) and the *!*. One of my first and faithful commentors, you gave me that "drive" to keep blogging, so I did. Oh, you volunteer at TCH, so you're extra cool! Alice - Also a fiddler of superior talent, you let your actions do all of your talking. You have her ups and downs, but still has full faith and trust in God, and for that I admire you. You and Steph have both inputted your thoughts on God stuff, and I appreciate them both. Allen - If you want to find a man of God, look no further. Me and you, we get along so well, we're like bros. Don't talk to you much during the week since he's a fish at Rice, but come Sunday, we catch up as best we can in the ten minutes we eke out before service starts. Sometimes its only a couple seconds, but all that’s really needed for us is a hello, a hug, and a goodbye. Also a master violinist, you are definitely deserving of my admiration. Natasha - We became quick friends sophomore year, but hadn't had a class with her since until this semester. I quickly saw that you were a person of great character and thirst for God, and you set an early example which I wanted to follow. A pk who's a leader in her youth group, you earn your spot on my links list. Katherine - You Aida freak!!! My earliest memories of you were two summers ago in SAT class. Now, we're neato choir buddies, and your singing ability is quite good. Just stop singing choir sings Outside of choir. :P Ericka - What can I NOT say about you? It seems as if every aspect of you is worthy of my admiration. You were one of my first real high school friends, and the example you set in the early going has been an invaluable motivation to reach my potential. Thanks for being that great friend, I can't stress that enough. Also one who possesses the rare quality of active compassion, you have always been strong support when your friends were weak. You can hold your own. You seem to define what integrity is all about, and you truly reflect to others the love God has for us. Though I doubt you read my page, because you are who you are, you've earned your place on my links list, and I thank you again. P.S. Also a massive concert violinist. d jae - Last on the list but certainly not least. You may refer to yourself as d jae, but to me you're still Jonathan. Our friendship seems to be the most perplexing thing I've ever seen. We don't speak, we don't talk, we don’t IM to each other, we're not even in each other's presence all that often, yet we watch out for each other. It's almost like a distant and very indirect pen pal relationship. The thing that's kept me hooked on your blog is that view you in a positive light. You are a man of God…you know He's there, you're willing to defend Him at all costs(and you do it quite effectively, you know your stuff), And what's more is that you seem to be your own army of one when it comes to topics dealing with God and you don't buckle. You're one tough fellow, and you've got guts and character. Our schedules seem to conflict everywhere, so I guess I'll scrap what I can from the window into your mind your blog provides. Keep it real. I've got your back if you need me. P.S. He's one cool hip-hoppin', sharp-shootin' guy. Now addressed to all: I look up to all you guys (and ladies…who outnumber the guys 5 to 2). I really am indebted to all you've done for me in the past and present. You all have something I lack and am trying to gain. I regard all of you highly. If you have something to say to me, I'll listen and consider it seriously, because your thoughts and views matter to me. If I'm doing something wrong (which I tend to do a lot), tell me, don't let me slide. What do YOU think?? |
Please Read This: Justin's View on Relationships (Written by a friend) Justin® song of the week: Ultimate Cheeseburger Yao Ming Song Leisure listening: KSBJ Reading Selections: My Fellow Longhorns: WeiLi Johnny Christine Oren Nathan Sam Rose ChuMonster Alex Jake Jonathan My Beloved Owls: aida freak Steph Allen JASON!!!! stones and fire Jonathan Sam My Other Collegiates: Justin the Other Albert FireStones Keith CollegeNet Natasha My younger High Schoolers: Jason, the Leader Cindy fat can Ninja Linda Jesse AudioFreakJames Christine My Sis Little Brother Alice there's probably more, I just got a bit lazy. | ||
